Reclaiming a movie is a tricky pickle indeed. If done with the best intentions , you are encouraging others to possibly give a movie in bad-hype jail a second look. You’re doing this because you yourself have given said film a second chance and you were generally pleased by your decision. This is all well and good but there is a certain, ever-growing group of individuals who are suddenly giving out proverbial medals to those who already been tried justly and have been unanimously deemed a stinky poo-poo head.
Reclaiming a legitimately bad movie is a kin to scraping years of freezer burn off that half gallon ice cream that was back deep in the freezer. Unfortunately, after all the trouble of resurrecting this frozen dairy product, you take one spoonful and immediately remember why it was in the way back in the bowels to begin with. You Fucking hate Tin Roof Sundae.
We tend to think reclaiming is fueled by nostalgia or sentiment and that is so wrong. Really really wrong. Nostalgia creates petitions to an already beloved but forgotten property back into the current zeitgeist in hopes to reignite new content. Reclaiming in this devilish fashion is a vindictive move by the generation who weren’t even alive when that particular movie first ran down the puckering asshole of some coked up producer. It’s an act of cultural rebellion plain and simple. It’s the film nerd version of a liver wurst sandwich. The lady behind the deli counter doesn’t think you’re cool for ordering a half a pound of vomit meat.
Now, I know what you’re thinking but you’re dead wrong. Reclaiming isn’t just dusting off a forgotten, underrated gem and putting it in the main showcase. That’s a whole different animal, my friend. That’s actually underrated and a whole other chapter!
These so-called movies that I’m discussing are not forgotten at all. In fact, they are still in the cinematic conservation as…*really terrible movies!* These keyboard agents of chaos are pushing a false narrative to endow positive attributes to a lump of hairy excrement and then have a good laugh at our expense. They’re the same people who voted for Trump simply because they wanted to see their liberal neighbors squirm. Or they’re racist homophobes. Either or.
So the following list is my personal recommendations of film that I generally believe have falsely accused of hack-workery.
